A Brief Breakdown…

… Of Mitt Romney’s Cairo comments. 

"The embassy in Cairo put out a statement after their grounds had been breached, protesters were inside the grounds," said Romney at his press conference. "They reiterated that statement after the breach. I think it’s a — a terrible course for America to stand in apology for our values. That instead, when our grounds are being attacked, and being breached, that the first response to the United States must be outrage at the breach of the sovereignty of our nation. And apology for America’s values is never the right course."

1.  The embassy in Cairo put out a statement after their grounds had been breached, protesters were inside the grounds. (they hadn’t) 
2.  They reiterated that statement after the breach. (They didn’t)
3.  I think it’s a — a terrible course for America to stand in apology for our values. (I didn’t know making categorically offensive anti-religious propaganda films was an american VALUE)
4. That instead, when our grounds are being attacked, and being breached, that the first response to the United States must be outrage at the breach of the sovereignty of our nation.  (IT WAS)  

Day 49 (baseball politics)

What do the red sox and the GOP have in common. They both ran out of people that could actually allow them to win and decided in the end to just throw in anyone this time around. Didn’t turn out so well for the Sox, we’ll see how it goes for the GOP. 

Day 33 (A New Low for Shapiro)

I thought that the death of Andrew Breitbart, and his burial in our collective server’s sewers would give rise to something better than this piece of shit by Ben Shapiro. 

This isn’t even responsible blogging, and I am LEFT “watching the watchers.” 

What I think might even be worse is that Ben might actually buy into his own particular brand of fecal matter.

According to Shapiro: 

Obama endorsed Occupy Wallstreet -which he never did- and the movement is antisemitic -which it isn’t- because it has a public forum where a cretin posted an antisemitic, anti-Obama cartoon. 

This is just lazy sloppy “writing,” even for a Breitbart.com piece. I mean if you are going to convince people that occupy is tied to Obama and is antisemitic, perhaps the best way to do this is not with a cartoon that is insulting to both Jews AND Obama. 

This argument is the equivalent of saying, Mitt Romney endorsed Breitbart.com which is racist because the comments section has racist posts from people. 

Excerpt from comments section for THIS EXACT article:

Sorry, but there’s no problem facing Israel that several million Jewish immigrants from there to the US wouldn’t solve. They win, the US wins.

That’s as ignorant a comment as saying if we kicked all black people out of The United States in 1850 we would have a zero crime rate …

Looking at the crime statistics, it WOULD go down sharply.  

Now if only one of these comments also mentioned Mitt in a negative light the hypocritical stupidity of this loose stool sample excuse for a worthless blog post would be complete.

Ben Shapiro thanks for managing to lower the bar further with every putrid breath you take…

A Boyscout troupe leader committed a triple murder in 1985, and you know the honorary president of the Boyscouts of America is the President of the USA, so he must have endorsed it. I guess Ronald Reagan is endorsing murderers.


Day 30 (Romney Bot)

Sadly the last man standing in the race to the bottom, has about as much flavor as uncooked Tofu. My ethos demands more of his. It’s not even a lack of common blue collar desire to get a beer with the man, (he couldn’t anyways) it’s a fear that the liquid might gum up the works. Trigger a seizure, and he might have to be rebooted.

It was once argued by Hunter S. Thompson, that the only true way to observe certain politicians was subjective. “You had to get Subjective to see Nixon clearly, and the shock of recognition was often painful.” Thompson stated bluntly in his eulogy for the man. He, like many, opined that the only reason Nixon lost to JFK was the medium of television.

"Interestingly, most people who heard those debates on the radio thought Nixon had won. But the mushrooming TV audience saw him as a truthless used-car salesman, and they voted accordingly. It was the first time in 14 years that Nixon lost an election."

It it with this in mind that I return to the Robot in the room, Romney has the charisma of stale bread, and the haircut of a Nazi Youth Poster.

nazi youth

Sure this may be a cruel observation, but I think I may have been too kind, say what you will about Nazis at least they had personality. In talking with many moderate democrats in Massachusetts this weekend I found that they all seem to think mitt was “alright as a governor” but aside from Romneycare -the albatross around his neck- they can’t think of a single memorable thing about his reign.

It seems Massachusetts politicians come in two flavors, Sugar-free Vanilla as is the case with Romney and John Kerry, or Green Tea Mango surprise as is the case with Ted Kennedy, and Barney Frank.

Don’t get me wrong I don’t know that Green Tea Mango is necessarily good, but it is at least a fucking flavor.

I guess we are all stuck with watching him flop around like a dying fish in desperate search of water, or I suppose in his case a personality.

The Tea Party came to Boston this weekend and called a bunch of protesters “Faggots” but even that didn’t cheer me up today, maybe a Michelle Bachmann quote…

"We want women to make choices, that’s why on healthcare we want women to have health savings accounts and the ability to be able to make their own choices in healthcare… Women don’t need anyone to tell them what to do on healthcare. We want women to have their own choices, their own money, that way they can make their own choices for the future of their own bodies."

That’ll do pig, that’ll do.

Day 17 (Pornographic Democracy)

Romney’s Victory and my inevitable departure from my attempt at a detox week cause me to troll old love letters to see if I was always this way:  

It has been but a fortnight since we last spoke, alas the war does not go well for us. Colonel Jim Beam had put up a good fight, but in the end he fell, empty, and joined his five identical brothers in a cardboard box. He is drunk but not forgotten… who am I kidding, he is totally forgotten.

Alpacas are the new gold, or so conservative radio tells me. They will be used to service the future crisis gardens when we are all peanut farmers and living The Book of Revelations. Naturally Jimmy Carter will have a head start. I guess I like political letters, or am a one trick pony….

…. shit, I suppose there is no cure.   

Day 9 (medical follies)

medically induced comas leave Mitt Romney somehow more intriguing. I know this isn’t a charisma contest, but when people think the podium you are standing on is more congenial than you, you have a problem. 

Chief Justice Roberts Itched his nose today when Long spoke, signaling clearly that he will vote in Verrilli’s favor.

The die has been cast, but I fear there will be no conclusive decision as to the side it landed on. 

Day 4 

Do not disturb written in all the languages in the universe couldn’t get the maid to not enter my room at 8am sharp this morning. I am thinking of hooking up a car battery to the door knob, a form of classical conditioning, positive punishment meant to make your hair stand on end. 

Illinois went with Mitt, the Jets went with Tebow, and I went with whiskey. I think we all know who is winning here.